We finally broke it to the rest of the family this weekend that another baby will not ever come through this body again. It's because I'm having my ovaries removed at the end of May.
Having a second baby was never really in the cards post cancer. But I had always hoped, thinking that maybe it could happen. It's definitely not happening now.
My ovaries are producing high levels of estrogen. Right now I visit the doctor each month and get a shot in the belly with a drug that suppresses the ovaries from functioning. It puts them in kind of a sleep mode -- it's also considered to be menopause. The whole point is to block any estrogen in my body so that cancer doesn't have any fuel to grow.
Additionally, I take a drug every day called Arimidex. This also blocks estrogen. It's difficult to understand how it actually works, so I won't explain. But the important thing is that you must be in menopause for it to work effectively.
Right now, I'm not in menopause because the monthly suppression shot isn't enough to control my overactive ovaries. They are seriously trying to kill me. So for months now, I've been flying blind taking a medication that is basically not doing jack in protecting me from cancer.
My oncologist believes that removing the ovaries is the best plan of attack in staying cancer free. I've gotta agree, obviously.
I had to take a day or two to come to grips with what this surgery means. And it means: no more children. That's the biggie. It also brings a whole host of other things too: bone health, heart health, more memory loss, weight gain, skin changes, yada, yada, yada.
So the countdown is on. Five weeks. Stay tuned.
4 comments:
Wendy - I'm sorry to hear you have yet more surgery to go through - plus all the mental adjustment that goes with an ooph. I must ask my onc about testing to see whether my OS is working. I might be joining you in the ooph gang later this year. *hugs* Jen
I'm sorry, Wendy. But I hope you'll feel better when it's all said and done. We were never able to have a second child, either, and for the longest time it felt like such a tragedy to me. God has a way, though, of showing Himself when the time is right. Now I get why we just had the one, and I'm so grateful. I hope someday you reach that point, too.
Praying for you.
Okay, without getting too preachy here, this is the plan God has for you. I know it doesn't change the way you feel, and I know that only you can understand what you are going through, but right now there is one child that thinks you are the best Mommy in the world. And not too many Mommys can say the same.
Sorry to hear that. Cancer sucks in many ways. I'm going to send you the first two chapters of my book. I think chapter 2 will really speak to you during this time.
I finally responded to the award you gave me in Decemeber!
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